Hi everyone-

Today is Feb 5th, supposed to be chemo day, but is not. They apparently were waiting for Medicaid to be confirmed, since it was not, they did not go forward with chemo. Spent the morning at the Chemo center talking with the doc. Apparently, they did not have all of the four meds at the center anyway today. (I think they were waiting to order it before confirming we had a payee source-which we don't as yet). I spent part of the afternoon on the phone with Medicaid only to be told she doesn't qualify unless she is over 65, blind, pregnant, has kids, or is disabled. To be disabled, Social Security makes that determination. That phone call happens Tuesday.

Chemo is set to happen Monday and it will, even if I have to pay Out of pocket to make it happen. I will not take no for an answer. Like Bridget said today- since when did healthcare stop being about caring for sick people and turn into a business. AND you know what, she is right. It has.

We learned the results of the bone marrow and PET scan. She has it in one side of her bone marrow- the left side. The PET scan basically confirms that it is in her neck, chest, abdomen and half of her bones. This makes her a Stage 4 B. Stage 4 means that it can be found in more than one organ system, The B means she exhibits symptoms- night sweats, cough, anemia, Shortness of Breath.... The cure rate is still 80% for Stage 4.

As you might figure, we are both down about this news. She more than I, to her it seems like God is not answering her prayers. I, being the nurse person that I am, was expecting something when I saw how anemic she was and when he asked for the bone marrow. But in her presence, I am a rock. It scares her when she sees me breakdown, and I see the fear in her eyes. SO, I am a rock.

We are moved back to Butte, and somewhat settled in the house. I have rooms set up but live among boxes. Maybe this weekend I can get boxes sorted and put away. I still have to clean the apartment in Helena Saturday, that should not take long. Leaving me part of Sat and Sunday to get into boxes.

Zach and I are adjusting to the "bedroom community commute", between Butte and Helena. I figure it will take another week to get bodies adjusted to the earlier schedule. We live for days off and weekends.

I will be here in Butte on Monday for Bridget's first chemo. I can work from home, thank God for great Bosses and co-workers who are so understanding.

Speaking of being understanding, I don't have enough words to thank everyone that helped with the move. We are so blessed to have such a great Family and great friends as well. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for the move help, the cleaning crew, the meals for us... I SO appreciate each and every one of you!!! I can't thank you enough and I OWE you all big time.

Well, that is it for now.
Posting this, and not calling because Qwest set up my long distance screwy and it will take days to get it reset.

Love to you all.

Denise, Bridget and Zach